Ray's personal story

Well I have been in an abusive relationship for 15 years. These are the things that have happened:

On many occasions things that I would tell in confidence would be used against me in an argument or aired publicly at an event. Constant referral to questioning my manhood regarding sticking up for her in embarrassing situations - wanting me to hit the other guy. So many physical attacks where she would lose control, throw things at me or kick and punch. At least 3 - 4 times a year. I am a martial artist of many years so I know how to block or take a punch - I never once hit her back but deep down these things have affected me. I feel she wants me to hit her so she can have an excuse to hate me. I will never hit a woman.

I wish I could leave but she threatens to take my boy away from me and my home which I fully owned before she moved in. She has only worked part time and has never contributed financially to anything. She does not do any housework and knows she has me over a barrel.

How on earth can our society ignore what's going on behind closed doors? It's double standards. If I did one fraction to her what she has done to me I would be locked in a jail cell. Judges, media and the general public think that a man should be able to take it. I also feel that some women believe they can treat men any way they see fit with no repercussions. Well I have and personally I feel it's unjust. I think violence towards men is a bigger issue than most people think. It's responsible for countless suicides and depressions because it's shamed. I know there are some terrific girls out there who are not so violent. I actually think the rate would be equal - its just the violence is expressed in a different way...