One in three victims of family violence are male

Men's stories

MEN’S PERSONAL STORIES

If you are a male victim of family violence – intimate partner violence, violence from other family members, child abuse, elder abuse, sexual assault, or other forms of family violence and abuse – this page is available for you to tell your anonymous story. Please click here to tell your own story. If you feel like you need support, please click here. Stories are moderated to prevent the posting of spam, so it might take a little while for your story to appear on this page.

 

Max's personal story

I am grateful that you feature this issue.

I have been abused by my wife multiple times, both verbally and physically. After numerous violent attacks from her, I finally called the police for help.

They took her into hospital for a mental check up. The doctor there couldn't find out anything wrong about her and they put the attacks down to "hormone imbalances" as she was 4 months pregnant at that time.

The policeman who spoke to me - me having a shiner and other signs of her serious beatings - told me exactly what your article states, "...to just wear it on the chin..." and "...to man up."

He even said he was doing the same at home sometimes. Go figure!

Being newly wed, I stuck inside this violent relationship for another 12 months - a baby was on the way too - not an ideal time for a break up.

The violence from her continued, bearing in mind that I have never been violent towards her.

Desperate, I then sent a lengthy e-mail explaining the ongoing torture to the Psychological Doctor who initially assessed her as well as to the mental health nurse who knew her, asking for help.

By now I had been attacked whilst holding our baby in my arms.

Both Nurse and Doctor never got back to me or followed this up.

Prior to having a baby or the police being involved - when my wife first started being violent towards me - I contacted my wife's family, asking for help.

Their reply was that she was "my problem now" and that "I had to deal with her." Her parents are not uneducated either - her stepmother even being a nurse herself.

We now are separated but I have suffered from depression since this has happened last year.

I have not been able to go back to work and find the worst about it all is the absolute lack of support from the system.

Coping with this is hard as it is expected from a man to just deal with it.

Needless to say it has been devastating.

Hope the world wakes up to this, hence I wrote my story here.

One in Three Campaign